Ashley Lynn. Indianapolis, IN. Pro-Choice Christian. Bartender. 22 since March 13th. Barack Obama. Kinsey 2 straight. I have a theory for everything and can think of a song for anything you may say. As you can tell, I have direction in life, yet no footing, &&I'm beginning to find it beautiful. People and places are my thing. I love camping and being outside. My current favorite place to be is Gatlinburg, TN, though I plan on that changing. If I don't post quotes or pictures, then it's simply me speaking my heart, though it's a far ways down on my sleeve.
“There were two ways to be happy: improve your reality, or lower your expectations.”
Jodi Picoult (via observando)
Charles Bukowski | Acrylics on canvas | 100x140cm
“I’ve never been lonely. I’ve been in a room — I’ve felt suicidal. I’ve been depressed. I’ve felt awful — awful beyond all — but I never felt that one other person could enter that room and cure what was bothering me…or that any number of people could enter that room. In other words, loneliness is something I’ve never been bothered with because I’ve always had this terrible itch for solitude. It’s being at a party, or at a stadium full of people cheering for something, that I might feel loneliness. I’ll quote Ibsen, “The strongest men are the most alone.” I’ve never thought, “Well, some beautiful blonde will come in here and give me a fuck-job, rub my balls, and I’ll feel good.” No, that won’t help. You know the typical crowd, “Wow, it’s Friday night, what are you going to do? Just sit there?” Well, yeah. Because there’s nothing out there. It’s stupidity. Stupid people mingling with stupid people. Let them stupidify themselves. I’ve never been bothered with the need to rush out into the night. I hid in bars, because I didn’t want to hide in factories. That’s all. Sorry for all the millions, but I’ve never been lonely. I like myself. I’m the best form of entertainment I have. Let’s drink more wine!”
Original for sale
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I’m used to disappointment. I’m used to laziness. I’m used to loving someone way too much and caring way too much and crying way too much because of it. It’s one of those things where you put your all into “togetherness” but the other person doesn’t know that’s the objective of life and so you just keep pressing on and one step forward, two steps back you end up in tears again when you swore last time was the last time but you can’t give them up because it’s love after all, and that’s not what love does but you spend years together foreshadowed by this inherent dark cloud of everything you’ve swept under the rug, and now that it’s time for spring cleaning you’re afraid to show what you’ve been hiding for fear that they’re hiding the same thing and that it will lead to your demise. Because that’s what’s always lead to it.
If you are reading this, I love you and nothing will change that.
I’ve been in one of two relationships from 8th grade to this year, so why does feeling free suffocating me? Why can’t I embrace the loneliness and assure myself that it’s all for the cause? Why does love have to be all-encompassing and leave you empty and hollow when it’s not what you feel is good for you anymore? The world shall never know.
“Indianapolis, Indiana is the first place in the United States of America where a white man was hanged for the murder of an Indian. The kind of people who’ll hang a white man for murdering an Indian—that’s the kind of people for me.” Kurt Vonnegut
I’m afraid I’m doing everything wrong in trying to do everything right and the only thing I’m accomplishing is hurting you.
one time some guy asked for my number and he was really nice but i’m in a relationship so i just said so and he was like “no worries, take it as flattery then”
THAT’S how you handle rejection, not by stabbing a girl in the fucking neck
sex in the shower? no. slip and bust my ass. break my dick. she slippin too. she knock her head on the tile she passed out. bleedin. i cant walk cause my jimmy snapped. thought this was gonna be sexy and we both end up half dead.
(Source: zootedboy, via misanthropeofthemonth)
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